For many years I have struggled with how I can really trust a God who would allow horrible, damaging things to happen to a small child. I have been watching God heal areas in my life as I open them to Him. He has indeed been walking with me. But I seem to have hit a stumbling block – I want more of Him, and fear more of Him. I know that sentence does not make sense, but it is my life. I learned fear up close and personal at 3, and it has been with me for 62 years. I want His peace, but I don’t know what to do now. I have so much to be grateful for, been married for 42 years to beautiful faithful husband and father and grandfather. I just seem stuck, and before this I have not told anyone about how I feel. Folks look at me and think that I have it all together – when at best, I am a scared child.